Vulnerable Honesty - Day 3

Vulnerable honesty is a powerful thing.

When we’re vulnerable and honest, people respond well to it. Vulnerable dishonesty can be powerful too. It looks and feels like vulnerable honesty, but it’s a manipulation device. We think someone’s opening their heart to us, but they’re not. It’s an enchantment being used to manipulate us. The problem is, once we respond by opening our heart, it can be hard to tell whether we’re being lied to or not.Sometimes when we’re going through an extended period of pain, such as battling depression or a chronic problem, we may get tired of sharing how we feel. We may think, “Why would anyone else want to hear who I really am? I don’t even want to hear about it myself.”We may have been hurt by being vulnerable before. Then we made a decision, a choice. “I’m never going to let anyone hurt me again.” Not being vulnerable doesn’t mean we won’t get hurt. Whether we like it or not, taking the risk to love anyone puts us in a vulnerable place.Defensiveness protects us but it also pushes people away. Vulnerability pulls people in. How about taking a risk and letting some of those tender feelings show?

Challenge: The hardest thing about vulnerable honesty for me is getting out of my head and into my heart, trusting myself—not other people—to say who I really am. Sometimes I’m so used to being strong that I don’t even recognize vulnerable feelings. What’s the hardest thing for you?

Go ahead. Try practicing vulnerability. It grows on us after a while.

From the book: 52 Weeks of Conscious Contact